Silly Thoughts, etc.

Questioning the Lessons from Little Women

2008-10-25T10:40:00.002-04:00

Louisa May Alcott's Little Women is one of my favorite books. It was one of the first great works of literature I ever picked up, and I have read it over and over again through the years. As much as I love this work, however, I am still skeptical about some of the lessons that I think Alcott wanted the reader to take away. My favorite character in the book was Josephine March. Josephine (Jo) was a tomboy who loved to write. She was almost constantly plotting her next story, and she and her sisters would often act out her sensational dramas for their own personal entertainment. Jo even sold some of her stories to newspapers and periodicals, which really helped her family out during a difficult time (her father was fighting in the Civil War).

When Jo grew up, she moved to a boarding house in New York to work and write. She met Professor Friedrich Bhaer, who was a scholarly older man, and they struck up a friendship. When she sold one of her stories to a paper and excitedly brought it to him, he criticized her writing, basically telling her that her stories were low-brow and that she could write things that were much better. She was crushed, of course, and this was one of the defining moments in her life. Later, she produces a work more to his liking, and they end up married.

I remember being a bit puzzled about this when I first read it, and even sometimes now, if I think about it long enough. Do writers have a responsibility to produce a particular type of literature? Is there something wrong with producing light, easy, and fun stories? I'm bothered by the question because it was evident that Jo loved to write the types of stories she wrote before she was influenced by Professor Bhaer. It was also evident that her family, friends, and some of the public loved to read them. I think there's a time and place for each type of literature, and I think Professor Bhaer was acting like a judgmental ass when he made it seem like there was only one type of literature worth reading or producing.

Sometimes people want mindless fun. Books that have somewhat predictable plots and thrilling and unlikely events are about like movies and TV shows: they provide a temporary, welcome escape. I like to be caught up in a character's perplexing mystery or burgeoning romance. I also like deeper works that prompt questions about the way people live their lives or the right thing to do in a situation. There's a time and a place for both, and I don't see why one is "bad" while the other is "good". So, if I were Jo, I'd like to think that I would have pointed this out, then gone back to Concord and married Lawrence instead (he did end up pretty much supporting Jo and Prof. Bhaer later on anyway--maybe if Prof. Bhaer would have encouraged Jo to write stories that sold better, that wouldn't have been the case).

That is yet another point at which I (as well as other fans of the book) balk: Alcott had Jo choose to marry Prof. Bhaer instead of her best friend, the young and handsome Lawrence. Jo and Laurie had real chemistry, and a lifelong friendship, and yet Jo marries the significantly older Prof. Bhaer. Even the most recent movie adaptation of Little Women knew that would be a tough sell: Christian Bale as Laurie couldn't lose out to someone who looked and acted like the Prof. Bhaer described in the book (think Santa Claus but with reddish brown hair)--it became slightly more believable when they had Prof. Bhaer played by Gabriel Byrne. Hm. Alcott seemed to be saying that you should marry someone who will make you a better person, even if that means passing up someone for whom you have a real passion. I'm not sure how I feel about that point. It seems like you can get that same benefit from a friend, so why settle for only one of those things when you can have both? Jo could have married Laurie and corresponded with Prof. Bhaer. Dilemma solved. It seems that Alcott wasn't the greatest at thinking of alternatives--she didn't make much use of the inclusive sense of 'or'. As a result, she paints Jo into a corner. Jo has to choose between being a "bad" person and giving into all her more basic desires (writing thrilling literature, having a young, handsome, and passionate husband), and being a "good" person (writing great and lofty literature, having an older, uglier but wiser husband, doing good deeds and works to better humankind). So, while this book was certainly one of the most influential in my life, I still find some of the themes problematic.

I'm not a student anymore....

2008-09-07T08:47:00.003-04:00

Well folks (or folk--I think only one or two people read this thing), I'm not a student anymore. I decided not to complete my Ph.D. in Philosophy, and now I'm trying to find a job in the Real World. It's tough going, because even though I'm fairly bright, highly motivated, and well-educated, I am unfamiliar with professional job application etiquette. I remain optimistic, despite some early application blunders. I'm being very organized, and have created an Excel Spreadsheet that keeps track of my job applications and their status. Sigh. Anyway, I'm starting a new way of life, and even though I haven't been immediately successful in obtaining gainful employment, I still feel I made the right decision.

Music and Leg-Shaving

2007-11-09T21:47:00.000-05:00

I really like it when I hear a song and I know just how one would dance to it. I can picture how one should move in my mind. Only certain songs evoke this response, and I find that interesting. One such song is "Rock Lobster" by the B-52s. Just listen to it, and maybe you'll be able to picture how you should dance. It isn't because they describe how you should dance in the song--the music just makes it seem (to me at least) that there's really only one way you would dance to that song. While playing Guitar Hero III, I find it is the same situation with the song "Mississippi Queen" by Mountain. Weird, huh?

Speaking of weirdness, I noticed two things at the gym: 1) Mr. Sinew does not shave his legs; and 2) Mr. Bulky does shave his legs. Pretty funny. Next on the agenda is to see whether Mr. Bulky shaves his arms. I need to be careful--I think I have somehow captured the attention of Mr. Bulky (I guess I'm not as sneaky with my scrutiny as I need to be). I think I have caught him looking at me a time or two, and...well I won't state my second suspicion, because when it is typed out it just looks crazy. One thing is almost certain--if he is looking at me, it is not with some sort of romantic or sexual interest. I would wager it is either consternation or curiousity ("How can someone be that weak and live?"). What would be really bad is if he has a name for me. "Ah, there is Ms. Short and Squat."

Gym Stories

2007-11-07T20:58:00.000-05:00

So I promised more stories about the characters from the gym, which I shall now deliver. Mr. Sinew is not very interesting--he comes in when I am finishing my workout, and thus I cannot really say much about him. Mr. Bulky is almost always around at the time I work out. He is somewhat interesting. Mr. Bulky has the face of a...well, a nerd, really. I sense an element of defiance in him: "Maybe I look like a nerd, but with a build like this, does it really matter?" It is not that I think there is something wrong with being a nerd (that's pretty much what I am, right?), but I wonder if that is what drives Mr. Bulky to spend so much time at the gym. I wonder if he was teased a lot in school, or bullied. Then again, maybe he thought working out would improve his chances with the ladies or the men. I'm pretty sure that he is not doing it primarily for the health benefits. He wants his body to look a certain way, and he has taken great care to get it to its current state. I keep meaning to try and see if he shaves his legs, as bodybuilders often do, but I never remember to look. Plus, I try not to look at him too often--everyone at the gym tries to refrain from looking at everyone else, especially the serious gym rats, and we certainly do not speak to each other. It is an unwritten rule of early morning gym etiquette.

Random Silly Thoughts

2007-10-24T18:14:00.000-04:00

1. I've been going to the gym a lot lately, and have become used to seeing the hardcore gym rats. I have named two of the freakishly fit ones. One is heavily muscled in a bulgey, bulky way, and thus is named Mr. Bulky. The other one is heavily muscled in a lean way, and has muscles on top of muscles, almost all of which you can see because he has so little body fat. I call him Mr. Sinew. More on characters from the gym later.

2. If my current life were a movie, I would want my character song to be Santana's "Black Magic Woman." I'm pretty sure that isn't the song a director would pick, though. I'll have to think about what song would actually be played (which song would actually fit my personality, etc.). Feel free to make your own suggestions about which songs you think would fit my personality, or even better, what you would want your character songs to be, and what songs would actually be played.

3. Halloween parties are surprisingly thin on the ground this year. I have only heard rumblings of one in the philosophy department, and the host of that one cannot do it until the weekend after this one (meaning that the party would actually be held in November, *SIGH*). I feel like that is a sign that I'm getting too old for Halloween, and that is sad. Michael and I already have costumes and everything. Bleh.

The Philadelphia Story

2007-10-12T22:59:00.000-04:00

Michael started feeling sick around 3:00 P.M. today, and when I got home after six, it was apparent that we would be staying in and resting. He wanted to be upstairs in bed, so we decided to watch a movie so that he could watch at it or sleep, depending on how he felt. We picked The Philadelphia Story. This is the one with Katharine Hepburn, Cary Grant, and James Stewart. It has been one of my favorite movies since I discovered it as a teen, but it is a bit strange that it should be so. I see a lot of myself in Katharine Hepburn's character, Tracy Lord. Those who have actually watched the movie know that is not really a good thing. Tracy Lord is highly judgmental and proud, and so very certain that she is always right. She expects everyone around her to rise to her standards, and those standards seem exacting and perhaps unattainable to many around her. One of the great lines comes from her ex-husband, who tells her "You'll never be a first class human being or a first class woman until you've learned to have some regard for human frailty." It took me a long time to figure out the lesson of the film, because the dialogue is sparkling and entertaining on its own, and the performances are engrossing. I would like to think that I have more tolerance for human frailty now than I did as a teen, but I'm probably still a little too harsh. In any case, it is a wonderful movie, and I think it does a fine job of showing that too much judgment and too little forgiveness makes one into a cold statue, rather than a warm human being.

Gym Experience #3

2007-09-11T20:30:00.000-04:00

Weight machines and being height-challenged just don't go together. I am convinced that workout machines are designed to make the people that actually need them feel ridiculous. Why does getting in shape require winding your body around bars and padded parts, resulting in lying prone in a position that is otherwise considered strange or indecent? WHY?

Gym Experience #2

2007-09-10T12:58:00.000-04:00

Jorge did not show up. My new life as a gym-going person begins somewhat inauspiciously.

Gym Experience #1, kinda.

2007-09-09T14:01:00.000-04:00

Technically, I have been to the Leach Center gym at least once before, so I guess I should instead claim that this is my second gym experience, but whatever. Since I have so much trouble working out late in the afternoon, I decided to start working out in the mornings at Leach Center. I'm still a little freaked out about taking most of my showers there, but I hope the benefits will outweigh the inconveniences. I thought I would try to be smart, and go today (Sunday) so I could see the lay of the land, and figure out what machines I would use, etc.. This did not work out as planned. I've never used weight machines before. Ever. As a result, I have no idea what these things do, the best combination in which I should use them, or how to adjust them for my height and ability. I just wandered around the weight machine area, looking lost and terrified. I finally choked back my pride and waddled up to the Fitness Counter (geez) and explained my predicament, being very honest. And that is why I now have an appointment tomorrow morning with someone named Jorge, who will talk with me and prescribe a workout program based upon my fitness goals, as well as show me which machines to use and how to use them. I know I should be relieved, but right now I'm still pretty scared. I'm sure I will have more to say about this particular experience later.

Ridiculous

2007-08-23T21:52:00.000-04:00

So. This week I participated as an associate in a conference held by the Program for Instructional Excellence (PIE), and the first day was rather....not fun, just because I was one of the few poor souls assigned to the outdoor manual labor required in order to provide lunch and seating to about 300-350 people. Surprisingly, however, this wasn't the worst part of the day. That began soon after I got into my car (with the blistering hot steering wheel). I just wanted to get home as fast as possible, and I had just turned onto Jefferson, when lo and behold, I was suddenly behind a jeep filled with four guys. What was so bad about that, you may ask? Well, the fact that they were going TEN MILES AN HOUR down the street, slowing down to five at certain strategic spots. Why were they doing this? They were cruising down Jefferson, gaping at the slew of new potential sorority sisters packed under tents in front of the sorority houses. Just as I was about to punch my horn and lean out the window making colorful suggestions (I was very tired, very sweaty, and very angry, and thus not my usual reserved self), we came to a stop sign, and another car had the right of way, and got between us. What a STUPID way to spend your time. What an INCONSIDERATE thing to do to other drivers on a two-lane street. C'MON! (Said with Gob Bluth's intonation).

Books to Movies

2007-06-20T10:01:00.000-04:00

Yesterday, the newest installment of one of my favorite books series came out, and I read it in a matter of five or six hours. The book is the latest in the Stephanie Plum series by the author Janet Evanovich. The series is about an inept female bounty hunter in New Jersey, with quirky and strange supporting characters. I find the novels hilarious and fun, and I can picture almost every character. This always makes me yearn for a movie adaptation of the books, and I consider who would make the best main characters, etc.. Then, I remember to be careful what I wish for. Case in point: the Nancy Drew movie that is in theaters now. Now, though it is true that I have not actually watched the movie, I did watch an extended preview a month or two before the movie was released in theaters. That preview told me all I needed to know: whoever made the film and wrote the scripts and screenplay never read a Nancy Drew novel.

This realization was quite upsetting. I counted the Nancy Drew novels as one of the more formative influences on my life. I wanted to be a detective for the longest time because Nancy Drew was SO FREAKING COOL! I did my best to develop the sorts of skills she had, like keen observation and careful analysis of facts. I carry a magnifying glass in my purse to this day, just in case. I know it sounds ridiculously nerdy, but I think the Nancy Drew series (both the 1930s series and the 1980s series) was great! Nancy Drew was a smart and quietly gutsy young woman, who was mature for her age and who had better things to do than worry about getting married and having babies (even in the 1930s!). She loved puzzles and mysteries, and she didn't usually wait for Ned Nickerson (her standby guy) to go and investigate some really creepy areas. While the movie may have got THAT right, what they didn't get right was everything else. They have made that series into a mockery of what it actually was, and I hate the fact that anyone exposed to the movie and not the book series will think I wasted much of my youth reading some sort of ridiculous bubblegum crap. The characters are shallow and senseless, and almost nothing like what they were in the series. Anyway, it won't help to rant now. I just wish that the people who make these movies cared as much about the books they're ransacking for ideas as the fans of the books. Why should Harry Potter be the only well-depicted series?

Um?

2007-06-16T09:28:00.000-04:00

So. Michael was looking over the news on the internet today, and found this. I'm really not sure what to say, but....well. You'll see.

Mistaken Identity

2007-06-01T07:38:00.000-04:00

I received something unexpected in my campus mailbox--a letter from a young girl who thought I was an author of a biography that she had read. It was a sweet letter, with questions about the author's present-day occupation, and a request for recommendations for other biographies written for the younger set. She also expressed some of her own goals and hopes, and it made me think that perhaps not all children will turn out quite like some of the kids I see in class. For the first time in a long time, I felt less cynical. I am trying my best to find information about the author, but I have some fears that the author may be deceased. I think this book was published for the first time in 1944....and I know for a fact that the illustrator is dead. The book is a Scholastic title, and one in a series of biographies. I sent an e-mail to the Scholastic publishing office, in the hopes that someone will have contact information for the author, or will at least be able to tell me if she is dead. In any case, I will be able to write the girl back and tell her of some sites that are loaded with information about biographies for younger readers, so I am happy about that, at least. I might even purchase one to send to her, by way of apology for being the wrong person. I was very touched by the fact that the girl was so inspired by the book that she took the time to try and contact the author. I wonder if this is what C.S. Lewis felt like, every time he received a letter from an adoring young fan? If so, I can understand why he felt compelled to try and answer every letter.

Camping Trip!

2007-05-11T10:32:00.000-04:00

As some of you know, Michael and I took a camping trip to the place where we honeymooned, the T. H. Stone Memorial St. Joseph's Peninsula State Park. I have posted pictures from our vacation here, for anyone who is interested.

Michael and I are enjoying our summer, thus far. I have a lot of reading to do, because I'm taking my special area exam at the end of the summer. I am also participating in various reading groups, and will be assisting for a class during the latter part of the summer. Michael is busy working on experiments, as well as preparing lectures and course materials for the course he will be teaching in Fall 2007.

Michael has been really busy working with our yard by doing all the big stuff (seeding, watering, mowing, etc.), and I have been trying to do some of the more decorative and wild-life stuff (flowers, bird feeders, bird baths, etc.). We have a little above-ground pool that we will be putting up soon, and we need to level part of our yard to do it, as well as put up some lattice on our backyard fence to give us more privacy. Last year, the pool was on the side of the yard that is obscured mostly by our house, but we want to put it in a different spot this year. We also want to keep the neighborhood kids out of it, for fear that little kids might sneak in and drown, so we will be locking our gate and trying to obscure the fact that we have a pool back there. In any case, it should be fun, once we get it set up.

Anniversary, Cake, and Exercise

2007-03-16T16:57:00.000-04:00

This past weekend, Michael and I celebrated our first wedding anniversary (March 11). We were pretty tired, because it was the day after we drove back from Texas (we visited my family over spring break). We enjoyed a piece or two of the top tier (actually a tier baked separately just for this purpose) of our wedding cake. We were warned by a few couples to expect it to be dry and fairly tasteless, but it actually stood the test of time rather well. It wasn't the best cake I've ever had, but it certainly wasn't the worst.
Speaking of cake, I baked a cake for my dad over spring break that was marvelous! It is a family recipe that comes from my mother's side, and is my dad's absolute favorite. I had never tasted it before, because I was even pickier as a child than I am now. The cake has pecans in it and as I child I didn't like such things. I was very surprised at how scrumptious the cake was, and cursed my childish tastebuds for letting me miss out on this cake, which was baked every Christmas, up until my parents divorced.
Enough about cake. I am on yet another health kick, and trying to do the 10-week running program that I found in the online version of Runners World Magazine again (I think I went into detail about it in a previous post). I am still on Week 1 because I didn't run at all over spring break (I started it the week before). Hopefully this time I won't get discouraged, because I always feel really good after the workout, and I think I can already tell a difference in how I feel generally. Once I have the running stuff under control, I'll add weights into my routine, and then I'll start seeing major differences. THEN once I am in some sort of shape that is better than my average (which is probably classified as "severely out of shape") I will try to take up tennis in a more serious manner. It will be interesting to see how my strategy works out. By May 14, I should be able to run for 20 minutes without stopping, and if I am good and start the weights next week, I should start seeing results in my muscles as well. Only time will tell.

Matter over Mind

2007-02-15T18:39:00.000-05:00

I keep falling asleep in the afternoons. I've been really tired all week, and no matter what I try, it just happens. I had every intention of translating some Greek, but even after I drank a cup of coffee, I was out like a light. *Sigh* Doesn't my body understand that I have work to do, and that it shouldn't just knock me out whenever it wants?? Mind over matter MY ASS.

Valentine's Day

2007-02-13T15:01:00.000-05:00

This year, Michael and I plan to celebrate Valentine's Day as we have for the past three or so years. We are going to order a pizza (something a little more exotic than we usually get) and watch television as usual (we don't go out on Valentine's Day). For dessert, we will enjoy strawberry soda with strawberry ice cream (one of Michael's favorite desserts). Fun stuff. Tonight I'm making mini-cupcakes to put in the common room of the philosophy department. I like to bake, especially for people who don't get to enjoy baked goods very often (many graduate students). Hey, Peter....I just had a thought: too bad you aren't around the department anymore. Now that you aren't a raging vegan, you'd be able to partake of the joy. Why mini-cupcakes, some of you may wonder? Well, I received a nifty cake carrier for Christmas that has slots for mini muffins, but the biggest reason is that I feel like punching people who say, "Well, I would have had one, but I didn't feel like eating a whole cupcake." A whole cupcake. Like it's an effort. What are you, an infant?? A supermodel?? Just eat it or be truthful and say that you don't like sweet snacks, etc., or that you fear my cooking. Anyway, I'm excited about these cupcakes, because they are going to be chocolate sour cream cupcakes with cream cheese icing and sprinkles. Tasty.

Weird Dream

2007-01-20T09:43:00.000-05:00

I had a dream early this morning, in which I was running late to my college graduation (but the place looked like my high school). Later in that same dream, I had to keep hitting a a guy intent on murdering me in the head with a rock, to keep him unconscious until the police arrived. Hm.

A New Year

2007-01-13T15:55:00.000-05:00

Well, it has been a while since my last post, and lots has happened which . . . is probably not all that interesting. Thus, I will simply note that I am going to be very busy this semester with classes, but since they are all interesting it will be a lot easier to keep up with the required work.

I find myself with little to say at this point, but I hope this post will at least get me back into the habit of posting. When I do find something to say, I will have already broken the "it's a new year" ice. Anyway, until then, gentle readers.....adieu.

To Do: (Ugh)

2006-12-11T06:53:00.000-05:00

1. German exam (I didn't do so hot on the real exam, so now I have to do the in-class one)
2. Write 15-20 page paper for my Kierkegaard, Nietzsche, and Freud class
3. Write 20 page paper for Heraclitus and Parmenides
4. Grade papers
5. Pack and mail Christmas presents
6. Give Goose a bath

Hmmm...

Charlotte Bronte

2006-11-03T11:07:00.000-05:00

I can't figure out how to do the 'e' so that her name is spelled correctly. In any case, I adore Charlotte Bronte. I think I could be happy reading and re-reading her books all my life. If I had to go live on a desert island and could only bring one book, I would bring either Jane Eyre or Villette. I adore Jane Austen as well, but there is a strange quality about Charlotte Bronte's writing that makes it more passionate and internal, more .... exciting somehow. You feel like you really are in the head of the person, especially in Villete. I was recently moved to re-read Jane Eyre (I think it was my third or fourth time) and I found myself just.... joyous to read it. Have you ever loved any book so much that you felt compelled to read it often, and when you did you reacted to everything occurring? If not, you have truly missed out on a singular, perplexing, and intriguing experience. If I have a soul, it positively SINGS when I read Jane Eyre and Villete. I realize this probably sounds incredibly nerdy and dorky and maybe even disturbing, but some of you will know what I mean. If you do know what I mean, and feel like commenting, what books have done that for you? It would be interesting to see what sorts of books have such an effect on other people.

Ack!!

2006-11-02T08:13:00.000-05:00

So I'm very worried about my favorite show, Veronica Mars. It has never been the strongest show, ratings-wise. It is on the new network, The CW. The show is actually very good, and everyone that has watched it after I gave my recommendation has said, "This is actually much better than I thought it would be," and they continue to watch it! It comes on Tuesdays at 9:00 P.M. Eastern. I'm becoming increasingly worried because although Fox was showing House, M.D. (another show I watch) at 8:00 P.M. at the beginning of the season, after the World Series ended, they switched it to 9:00 P.M.. Which SUCKS. My poor fledgling show may not have a chance!! Do you know what the highest-rated show for that time-slot is right now?? DANCING WITH THE STARS!! What a STUPID STUPID situation. Veronica Mars is SO much better, and hardly anyone even knows it exists. I have a really bad feeling that it will be cancelled, and that will be so awful. It's my FAVORITE show. The characters are engaging and complex, and the writing is good!!! If you don't believe me, just check out an episode or two and you'll see!

Everything is dying.

2006-10-30T13:24:00.000-05:00

First my fish. Now my car. My car is dying. The people at Midas said those words that every car-owner fears: transmission. And not just "transmission fluid." Rather, "the problem seems to be something in the transmission, and we will need to take it out to figure out exactly what it is." All I know from my very limited experience is that whenever you hear the word transmission, it means this: $$$$ + Completely dead car one year later. I did not authorize the operation for my car. Michael and I are fast coming to the conclusion that it would cost more to fix it than the car is actually worth....so now we are keeping our eyes open for deals on used cars and we have decided to limit the use of my car. I think I'm just going to start walking. Yeah. Walking five miles to school everyday. Unlike a car, which wears down with much exercise, my body will actually get better with exercise. So, yeah. That's what I should do. Bleh. No, I'm not serious. I'm just going to hitch a ride with Michael for a while.

Eh.

2006-10-24T08:12:00.000-04:00

Well, I didn't update this when it happened, but the day after my last post, my fish died. I decided to make another post, because I am always troubled when my most recent posts are depressing. In any case, Phineas is dead and I do not have any plans as of yet to replace him.

I've been bad about wasting time lately (look at what I'm doing now, when I should be translating German, ick). I recently purchased the Sims 2 Pets expansion pack, and have been playing and playing. It is ridiculous. I have also been re-reading Jane Eyre. It is SUCH a good book. Every time I read it I cannot believe how good it is. It has been on my mind a lot lately, because the BBC did a four part miniseries of it recently, starring Toby Stephens as Mr. Rochester, and an unknown (I think her names is Ruth Wilson) as Jane Eyre. It was VERY good. I rewatched it with Tina this weekend, and we ate copious amounts of sweets and drank way too much tea. It was awesome.

Speaking of entertainment, do not waste your time seeing Marie Antoinette. I went to see it this last Friday with some of the women from the philosophy department, and we all deemed it a disappointment.

I am getting better. I finally went to the doctor about my lingering cough, and it is definitely clearing up with the medications I am taking. Hopefully I didn't damage my recovery this morning by going out with my hair wet (it was a bit cold), but I really hate it when I can't get a parking space in my little gravel lot that I have discovered. Well, I've rambled on enough for now, I really must get back to work.

My Dying Fish....

2006-10-17T12:13:00.000-04:00

So...my fish is dying. For some weeks now, I have noticed that he is bloated, and he has been getting progressively worse over time. I have expected him to die any day, and today he is definitely showing signs of dying. He is not dead yet....his gills are still moving a little, and if you move the bowl, he will move around a little, but he is swimming erratically. I feel....bad for him. I thought he was pretty old for a betta, but there are differing numbers regarding their average lifespan. Either way, I think I've had him for about one and a half to two years....maybe a little less. It seems longer than that, but it really can't be. I feel bad....I probably didn't take the best care of him. I try to convince myself that he was already half a year to one year old when I got him (and thus lived about three years, one of the average lifespan numbers), but I still worry that I could have taken better care of him. In any case, it is too late now.

To Bike or Not to Bike....

2006-10-15T19:16:00.000-04:00

I am out of my apathetic mood. Yay! I am seriously considering purchasing a bike. Michael thinks I won't ride it very much, and since I'm inclined to agree that such a thing is possible, I don't plan to spend all that much on one. I think I would ride a bike more than I would play an electric guitar, so that is something. Plus, one of my neighbors would like to purchase a bike and ride as well, and one of my friends already does own a bike and wants someone to ride with. So....this could work out!

I think riding a bike would be a good source of exercise, even if I didn't ride explicitly for exercise. It also seems like it would be more fun than walking. I need something like that, because I think I've gained five pounds and it depresses me. I don't want to buy new clothes unless they are smaller. I get very depressed going shopping for bigger clothes. As a result of this recent suspicion of weight gain, I feel the need to engage in fun sources of exercise (things where I am not constantly reminded of the fact that I am exercising). My neighbors don't have as much time to play tennis anymore (they both work at jobs that have cut out our time for tennis), and I'm not good enough to play with anyone else. But I can bike all by myself if need be. I don't know.

In another effort to lose those pesky five pounds, and possibly more, I keep reminding myself that I should eat to live, rather than live to eat. I find this is easier to do if I remind myself that there are lots of people who are starving...this makes me feel guilty, and I only eat enough to get full, which is much less than I normally eat (though I don't send money to those countries or anything, so I'm still being rather selfish). As an added impetus to eat not only less, but healthier, I remind myself that three of my grandparents contracted adult-onset diabetes from their poor eating habits.

Ah.

2006-10-05T18:54:00.000-04:00

So. I have a sinus/allergy thing going on now. Yeah. Maybe I'm dying. Maybe I'm weak, and I'm being selected against. I don't know. All I know is that I'm really, really bored with the whole coughing and altered voice thing. I still don't want to go to a doctor, because....I just don't. I'm stubborn, and only use doctors for special occasions. Month-long colds don't count....yet.

Michael and I recently purchased some Halloween candy (we buy it twice in the month of October, once at the beginning of the month, and then again toward the middle), and we are enjoying it very much. I'm excited about carving a pumpkin, but I need to think of what I shall carve.....I want to do something complex and cool. It is one of the few artistic things that I still do (but only once a year). I never can bring myself to sketch anymore, or even to make my silly comic strips. I haven't sketched in....years. Slightly depressing, that fact.

I also still want to play guitar. I wonder if I would be any good at it? Maybe I'm not cool enough to play electric guitar. Maybe playing electric guitar would make me cool enough to play electric guitar? Maybe I'll join my neighbor's air guitar band in the meantime.

I guess I just feel....well, apathetic. About everything. I think I need vitamins. Or sleep. Or healthier food. Or exercise. I need something.

Who's She-Ra?

2006-09-17T09:26:00.000-04:00

So my neighbor friend Lisa and I went to the new Halloween store by the Office Depot yesterday, because we love Halloween, and because Lisa was still working on her costume. She is going to be She-Ra. When we were at the cash register with a sword and blonde wig, this was the dialogue:

Lisa: If I worked here, I would ask everybody "What are you going to be?"
Cashier guy: So who are you going to be?
Lisa: I'm going to be She-Ra.
Cashier guy: Who's She-Ra?
{a stunned silence ensues for approximately ten seconds}
Lisa: {turns to Rachel} This guy just almost got himself punched!
Rachel: {laughing} He probably isn't old enough. {To cashier} How old are you, boy?
Cashier guy: {obviously surprised age is an issue, presumably because Lisa and Rachel are both young-looking and hot} Why? How old are you?
Lisa: Twenty-six!
Rachel: {still laughing} Twenty-four!
Cashier guy: Oh, I'm nineteen.
Lisa: {scornfully} Nineteen! Geez.
Cashier guy: So, She-Ra...?
Lisa: You know He-Man?
Rachel: She was his sister.
Lisa: {sounding indignant} She led a rebellion.

After this it gets pretty boring, but the guy claimed he would look it up on Wikipedia. Anyway, it was a humorous exchange, even though it makes one feel a bit old. Any of you people not know She-Ra? I suggest you visit the link, before you get punched.

Guitar Goddess....

2006-09-16T07:50:00.000-04:00

Lately I have been feeling the need to play a musical instrument, and in fact, to learn a new musical instrument. That instrument is an electric guitar. I guess I need to rock out? I don't know. All I know is that I keep thinking about purchasing an electric guitar, but I won't let myself right now. For one thing, Michael and I are saving for a Wii (the new Nintendo console, coming out in November). Between that and Christmas, I think to purchase something like a guitar (even the fairly cheap starter-kit one I would want) right now would be ill-advised. Plus, as Michael correctly pointed out, between the Sims 2 Pets expansion pack coming out in October, the Wii, and of course, ever-looming schoolwork, I probably won't have time to learn to play guitar. He thinks I wouldn't play it as much as I think I would, and this time I'll have to concede that he's probably right. But I still want to PLAY!!! Do you people think I could rock out? Do you think I could learn to play, given my personality and responsibilities? If I still want one come spring, I'll probably buy one. Any advice on what to look for in an electric guitar? Anything?

Flippin' out

2006-09-12T19:10:00.000-04:00

Since I rarely ever put on makeup and fix my hair, I thought I should take some pictures to commemorate such a rare event. Today I was successful in getting my hair to flip up at the ends!! I was so surprised that it actually worked, and that it actually STAYED that way all day! Anyway, here they are. Hopefully these show off the new highlights better too.

Offspring

2006-09-08T16:40:00.000-04:00

Not the band, but rather, children. I was talking about children with one of my colleagues the other day, and though I have no plans to have children right now, I often think about what my children might look like or be like. Michael and I plan to have at least one child, barring any problems with our reproductive systems by the time we get around to making 'em. I usually picture us with a little boy....I don't know why. Anyway, in the course of our tv watching, Michael and I joke a lot about how such-and-such kid actor is probably what our kids will look like, etc., and I thought I'd show two of the top contenders for what our children will probably look like (males). One is a young actor from the movie Nanny McPhee. He is small and short, with glasses, and red hair. He looks remarkably like Michael did when he was a little boy, and is as cute as a button. The other picture is of an actor named Martin Starr, and when he took this picture, he played the character of Bill Haverchuck from Freaks and Geeks, a short-lived but EXCELLENT show. He's tall and lanky and with glasses (our child is almost guaranteed to have eye problems) but his hair is brown. Change the eye color, and you have a combination of Michael and myself, as goofy as he may look. He was my favorite character from that show anyway. Anywho, if nothing else, this might make people laugh, or think about what their future children may look like (though if you already have children, then I guess this post might be boring, sorry). Which child do you think looks more like a cross between Michael and myself?

Griping

2006-08-31T18:42:00.000-04:00

Warning: I'm about to gripe about something. If you hate reading about people's gripes, etc., stop reading now.

Today, I was sitting in a windowed hallway in the building where my office is located, looking outside. A professor passed by me on his way to the office, and then passed by me again on his way back, a few minutes later. When he passed by me the second time, he said, "You really should be reading, or something. You have work to do." He was utterly serious, and was criticizing me right there. Without knowing ANYTHING ELSE OF MY ACTIVITIES.

He was working under this general principle: graduate students always have work to do.

Here are some things he didn't know:
1) I am normally in my office by 7:35 A.M. every day. Today was an exception, because my husband and I slept through our alarm.
2) My husband and I slept through our alarm because we have both been struggling with a terrible form of head cold, and crazy long days, to which we are adjusting in this, the first week of the fall semester.
3) I worked steadily from the time I reached school today (8:20 A.M.) until the time the professor spotted me in the hallway (about 3:00, or 3:10 P.M.).
4) That was my first real break of the day, and I was reflecting upon the fact that I had been so busy that I forgot to eat, and unfortunately, because I had another class beginning at 3:35, I didn't really have time to eat. I was also pleased because despite being sick enough to warrant sympathy from coworkers, I had managed to have a productive day.

The world is not a fair place. I just need to keep repeating that to myself. Maybe I am a lazy student, but I REALLY didn't need to hear that from ANYONE today. In fact, I NEVER need to hear that from anyone. Bastard. Ugh.

Sick....again.

2006-08-30T17:35:00.000-04:00

So, I have a cold. I caught it from Michael. Once he got sick, I pretty much resigned myself to the same fate. SIGH. It sucks buckets. I don't know what that means, but it sounds funny. Okay, I'm signing off because my head hurts.

No longer a Non-Blonde...

2006-08-24T16:01:00.000-04:00

I wanted to look a bit different, so I frosted my hair, as you can see from the pictures. Michael and the neighbors really like it, and I'm getting more and more used to the new color. I decided life was too short to think that changing my hair color is an important life decision, to be undertaken seriously and carefully. Anywho, let me know what you think!

Snakes on a Plane

2006-08-18T17:27:00.000-04:00

Michael and I, along with two of his comrades from the psychology department went to see Snakes on a Plane today. It was vastly entertaining, and hilarious. One of the comrades visited the site for the movie, and found a nifty feature, in which you can send a friend a personalized cell phone or e-mail message from Samuel L. Jackson, telling them to go to the movie with you. Michael received one of those messages and thought it was pretty funny. Anyway, it's a campy, quirkly little flick, and fun to watch.

Rachel Baker, B.S., M.A.

2006-08-15T12:27:00.000-04:00

Well folks, it looks like I don't have to resort to one of my fallback careers after all! I was granted my degree this morning, after an oral defense of my exam. I've been calling parents and telling neighbors and former professors, and doing strange little dances ever since. I'm SO happy (the "so" is pronounced in this case like "sew"). Two degrees down, ONE MORE TO GO. YEAUUHHH!

Rachel's Guide to Avoiding Sex in Middle School and High School

2006-08-12T09:22:00.000-04:00

I have a profile on myspace (yeah yeah, get your laughs out now, this is SERIOUS), and a lot of friends and family have contacted me on there. I was looking through some of the profiles this morning, reading blogs if they had any posted, and I was shocked by some of the things I read on the sites of some of the younger members. Some of these poor kids were pouring out some really awful stories about teenage pregnancy, and cheating boyfriends. I couldn't believe how young some of them were: fifteen and dealing with shit like that! It's RIDICULOUS. Now, I know I have almost always been pretty mature for my age, but I was NEVER, NEVER EVER ready emotionally for sex, pregnancy, or any of that crap when I was in FREAKING MIDDLE SCHOOL. I will also give away too much information and say that either I wasn't ready or I was too damn smart to do anything sexual in high school either (although, who knows....I really wasn't given much opportunity...I had all of two dates, all very innocent). But...I really feel the need to say something about this, even though it probably won't be seen by anyone who REALLY needs to see it. Here are some things to keep in mind whenever you feel the drive to have sex in middle school or high school:

1) Though it seems like everything during these years is SO FREAKING important and like that guy/girl is THE ONE, in the grand scheme of things, it is NOT very important, and that guy/girl is probably one in a long line of people you will ever have a crush on or fall in love with.

2) If you have any goals, you should consider what a baby or even a sexual relationship will mean for those goals. Also, YOU SHOULD HAVE GOALS (especially goals besides getting married and having babies)!!! You are young, vibrant, and your life is really just beginning. You don't want to be saddled down with a child, or with a serious and demanding boyfriend/girlfriend. Furthermore, your views and goals will change: so while you may think you want to be Susie or Sammy Homemaker, that will probably change.

3) If you think you are mature enough and smart enough to handle sex, then please please PLEASE wear a condom AND get on birth control. Try your BESTEST not to do one without the other, until you are ready and willing to deal with the consequences. Condoms break, and birth control (depending on the type) fails sometimes, due to things you may not even think about (especially certain medicines).

It all boils down to this folks: in middle school and high school, your hormones are going NUTS. So, for you to decide at this point in life that you are ready for sex is to say that people under the infuence of some sort of drug or someone in an asylum should be making important life decisions. Now, I know some of you feel ready, and would argue that you ARE ready and all I can say is that if that really is the case, then you will go through with guideline #3 without a qualm, and you are ON birth control or your girlfriend is on birth control, and you carry condoms with you and never EVER do anything without them. Okay, I've preached enough.

Test is over!

2006-08-10T11:06:00.000-04:00

Okay, so my exam is over with. My fate is sealed, the die is cast, all that jazz. It was nice being a graduate student in philosophy for a while, but I may not be meant to be one for as long as I had planned. Anyway, on to fun stuff!

I found that I talk about myself a lot on here, which makes me uncomfortable. I know I am somewhat self-centered, and it makes me feel bad. So, I am going to feature information about some of my friends on here every now and then, to make things more interesting and to let them know how much I value their presence in my life. The first featured friend is Crystal (pictured above). Crystal and I have been good friends since...I want to say junior high or maybe more like high school.

Crystal is sooooo funny. She was voted "funniest person" or something to that effect in high school. She is married to another friend, Jeff (he'll be featured later). Crystal is also a movie buff. She had one of the largest VHS collections I had ever seen, and has been converting it to DVD slowly but surely. In high school, Crystal was a free-thinker, new-agey type of person (I received my first tarot card reading from her), but she's become a lot more conservative since she got out on her own. She has been pursuing a degree in education, and plans to teach the offspring of other people when they are "still young enough to love their teachers." Yes folks: kindergarten.

Crystal also tends to be on the forefront of slang, probably due to her dogged resolve to keep in touch with pop-culture. She has also coined a few phrases of her own, one of my favorites being, "thirsty like the devil". She also was able to take into her own language the frequent and funny misuses of language from her two younger sisters. Thus, whenever we mean to say someone is "psychic" that gets changed to "psycho."

Speaking of her sisters, Crystal was one of the most responsible kids I've ever met, because from the time she was small herself, she was responsible for taking care of most of her sister's needs (waking them up, getting them fed, making sure they got dressed, etc.), and when she was able to drive, for making sure they got to school. She also was in charge of cooking dinners for her household.

From all of this, I hope you can see why Crystal is an awesome person and a great friend. If anyone who reads this knows Crystal personally, what might be nice is if they would contribute a comment or two about her as well, from their own experiences of her. Anyway, that, gentle readers, is Crystal.

Calming down...

2006-08-07T09:45:00.000-04:00

So I have two of my three questions answered for my masters exam. After I finished typing the second answer last night, I stopped feeling so hopeless about the endeavor. I might even say that I felt mildly euphoric! Perhaps the problem all along has been the worry that I would not finish on time? I don't know. I am still concerned with the quality of the answers I have given. But hey, the worst that can happen is that they will kick me out of graduate school, and after the last two hellish semesters I'm beginning to wonder if that really is all that bad. It will be embarrassing, to be sure, but....so what?! Yeah. So what?!

On a lighter note, has anyone else seen Lady in the Water? Michael and I disagree heartily about whether or not it is good. Michael thinks it sucked, while the neighbors and I think it was good. Now, I by no means believe it to be M. Night's BEST movie thus far (I liked Signs the best), but it was far from bad. Michael claimed the storyline was really stupid, and that the actions taken by the people were not very believable (namely, their lack of skepticism). I pointed out that it was difficult to see how anyone who loves Starship Troopers could criticize ANY movie, much less this one. Which is....fallacious reasoning, I'll admit. I was just being mean. Anyway, I'm just curious to see what some of my peers thought about the movie, to compare.

Alcohol and Truth....?

2006-08-06T12:30:00.000-04:00

I read an article here at WebMD that raised the question of whether or not people are truthful under the influence of alcohol, inspired by Mel Gibson's recent bout of anti-Semitic comments made while drunk. Some of the points were a bit disturbing, considering some of the things that have been said to me by people who were drunk, or by my own words and behaviors while drunk. It is easy to push some things back in your mind when you think people don't really feel the way they claim to when they are drunk, but a bit more difficult when you consider that those may be their true feelings. Either way, it is an interesting article, and will make me think twice about overimbibing.

ARGH!!!!!!!

2006-08-05T11:43:00.000-04:00

Someone just shoot me NOW. That way, people will say things like, "Aww, how sad! She was just about to get her masters too." If I live, then people will say things like, "Geez, what a shame. She was lazy and she didn't study hard enough and look at what happened?! She wasted all that time and now she is a FREAKING FAILURE." ACK! Okay, okay....I'm going to stop hyperventilating, and remember my fallback careers, and how even if I fail my masters exam, I'm still a WINNER:
1) Law school student, specializing in civil rights and/or environmental law (yes, I apparently have an aversion to money)
2) Intern at private detective agency (my secret dream has always been to be Nancy Drew....I'll just have to become so good I can refuse to take cases concerning cheating spouses, ick...)
3) Investigative journalist for Skeptical Inquirer Magazine, or Skeptic Magazine, or maybe the Center for Inquiry (whoo hoo, paranormal activity investigation here I come!)
4) CIA or FBI (they like philosophy students, right?? ESPECIALLY ones with some mad useful Ancient Greek skills.....*sigh*)
5) Umm...Ummm....okay, so I've run out of ideas....other than..bookstore clerk *shudder* and.....I don't know.

Enough self pity for now. Peace out.

Television, Master's exam....crap

2006-08-04T12:04:00.000-04:00

Well, I shouldn't be posting, but I'm taking a break from my master's exam. My master's exam is such that it is a week-long affair, during which I must produce answers to three questions, that should be about five pages long each. I have until Wednesday of next week to do this, and I feel.....fine.

So, I can now add another man to the roster of television characters with whom I am in love. As I explained to my husband, Michael, it is perfectly fine for me to be in love with these men, because they are fictional characters. Thus, he is in absolutely no danger of losing me to them, because they do not exist. The one with whom I have been in love with for a few years now is Fox Mulder (the guy in the suit, played by David Duchovny) from X-Files. Why do I love him? Well, he is funny, loyal, fearless, and he tirelessly searches for the truth. Even with all his qualities, I think he is better admired from afar. After all, he puts his work before everything else, frequently puts himself and those around him in danger, and has a penchant for porn, though the last characteristic is more comical than offensive.

The new television love is the character of Logan Cale from the sadly short-lived series Dark Angel (guy in the glasses, played by Michael Weatherly). That I am in love with Logan Cale and NOT Michael Weatherly is obvious from the fact that Michael Weatherly is now on the show NCIS, where he plays a character that is a bit of a jerk, and I am not in the least in love with THAT guy. So even though both David Duchovny and Michael Weatherly are handsome fellas, that actually has very little to do with their appeal. Why am I in love with Logan Cale? He is the daring reporter Eyes Only who takes great personal risks to get the truth out to the people, and he is loyal and determined, as well as unprejudiced, sweet, and kind. Now, why would he actually be a terrible boyfriend in reality? Well, just like Mulder, he tends to be more committed to his work than anything else, and he, too, frequently puts himself and those around him in danger (though he does try harder than Mulder ever did to avoid such things). He is also a bit too prideful. In the series, he is shot and is rendered unable to walk. This seems to be a major factor in his inability to actually begin a romantic relationship with Max (played by Jessica Alba), as he only begins flirting with her and really coming on strong whenever he comes across temporary fixes for his disability. Thus, he seems painfully insecure, and too prideful to accept help, or to believe that someone could love him even though he can't walk. Trust a guy to let something like that get in the way. Anyway, I'm going to stop waxing poetic about guys who don't exist, and get back to the Master's exam. And if you are reading this, my dear husband Michael, keep in mind that existence in reality (in this case at least) really IS greater than mere existence in the mind (well, television), and that I truly love only you.

Updates

2006-06-25T10:41:00.000-04:00

Okay, so lots has happened since my last post, and I'll try to summarize in quick, one-sentence segments.

Michael and I journeyed to Michigan a few weeks ago for a post-wedding reception given by his parents so that their friends in Michigan could enjoy the wedding celebrations.

I'm doing very well in my Latin course, but that will probably change since my other stuff (assisting and taking a graduate seminar) is about to begin.

I'm WAY behind on my reading for my master's exam. Damn.

I've started a running program I found online designed to gradually build someone up to running continuously for 20 minutes.

I've purchased a tennis raquet and some balls and have begun playing tennis with my very cool neighbors.

Whoo hoo!

Bummed out....

2006-06-04T10:37:00.000-04:00

So, for all those who think I'm a really good friend, etc., there is some evidence that I may not be as great as you think I am. There was a guy in high school that was my best friend, and he and I were really close. We fell out of touch about....four or five years ago. I have tried to call this friend several times over the years, using numbers given to me by other people who are somehow able to keep up with him, but my calls were never returned. Most recently, I called a number that was known to be his to try and invite him to my wedding. I used to think that maybe he wasn't getting the calls, and maybe his messaging service was screwed up (like my cell phone message service). This illusion was shattered when another friend found him on MySpace, and I tried to message him.

I messaged him twice. Once just a friendly, "Hey, how are you?" sort of message, that was sure to let him know that I wanted to get back in touch with him. He did not answer. After a few days, I looked at his profile again, and it said that he had logged on since I had sent my message (MySpace has that feature). So he should have received my message, and thus he was simply ignoring me. I then sent another message, letting him know that I could see he didn't want to talk to me, and that I would leave him alone, but imploring him to just let me know what I did to fall out of his good graces. Because I honestly have no idea what I did, other than allow myself to fall out of touch with him (and that wouldn't be fair to blame me completely for that, he didn't try very hard either). I made it clear to him that I wouldn't try to contact him anymore if he would just tell me what I did to piss him off. This message was also met with silence. So, I don't know what I did. I don't know why we aren't talking, and it really bothers me. It's like I feel guilty, but I don't even know why. Since this guy was very sweet in high school, and we were really close, I just assume that he probably has a good reason to be pissed at me, and I cannot for the life of me figure out what I did. So I guess I'll just try to push it out of my mind, and hope that one day he'll get around to telling me what the hell is going on.

Just in case.....

2006-06-03T12:16:00.000-04:00

I've decided to trick myself into getting into better shape. I have found that I have lost motivation to exercise, since I don't really have any event or reason to look all that good. I mean, I would LIKE to look good for myself, but I find that apparently that's not enough to keep me from digging into my wonderful ice-cream, snacking on chips, and reaching for an extra slice of pizza. Michael could care less if I gained tons of weight (isn't he AWESOME?!), and the problem is that I already think I look decent enough. But I know that can change pretty fast, because I've been gaining a slight bit of weight, and already my confidence is beginning to wane. Thus, I need to motivate myself. It doesn't work to say, "I want to look good for swimsuit season." So, I think I'm going to trick myself into thinking that I am preparing to become a special agent with the FBI. Lately, I've been looking into other careers, because as many of you all know, getting a degree in philosophy (even advanced) does not guarantee a job upon graduation. Luckily enough for me, philosophy is broad enough that I can get a lot of other jobs. Out of curiousity (sp?) I have been looking into jobs in the CIA and FBI, etc.. For the FBI, I think one of the better jobs would be special agent. Unfortunately, but justifiably, such a job requires a certain degree of physical fitness that I do not possess. So, just in case I ever decide to be a special agent with the FBI, I should get into shape! I'll let you all know how this works, or, ideally, many will SEE how this works. We'll see.....we'll see.

Piercings, Tattoos, and My Mobi

2006-05-26T12:55:00.000-04:00

Example #86 of how my mom is cooler, more laid-back, and generally more hip than I am: she recently got an eyebrow ring. I can't remember if I've blogged about this before (and don't care to look at my archives), but for those who don't know, my mom, Tracy, has three tattoos (to which she is always thinking of adding), and now, an eyebrow ring. I have no tattoos, and my piercings are confined to the ears. It IS strange, but has always been the case that my mom is more daring and...less reserved than I am. All of my friends adore my mom. They say she really is the coolest mom they know, and I have to admit that it is true. As a teenager, I rarely took advantage of this situation, probably to my father's great relief (though even he would have liked to have seen me date more...they were kinda worried about me for a while). In truth, I am much more like my dad. I will say that I fully supported and even suggested my mom's eyebrow piercing. She was thinking about getting a piercing done, but she wasn't sure where (her ear or somewhere different), and I suggested her eyebrow. Michael and I have a friend named Kara who had an eyebrow ring, and it had to be one of the coolest things I had ever seen. She wore it well. If I ever got a piercing anywhere other than my ear, it would be an eyebrow piercing.

All this reflection on how much my behavior contrasts with my mother's HAS had a nifty effect: I have finally figured out exactly what tattoo I would get, were I ever to get one. Any time I thought of getting a tattoo, one major reason I knew I shouldn't get one was that I didn't know what I would get. I had one thing recur to me over and over, and I couldn't figure out why that one symbol was always so attractive: a very simple, tiny anchor. You may ask, "Why an anchor?" It's not like I am a sailor, or in the navy, or that I hang around the sea or docks all the time. I don't even know how to sail. But I like the idea of a tiny little anchor (though I still don't know where I would get it), and I think I've figured out why. I like the idea of an anchor because I'M SUCH A DRAG! I'm steady, I stay in place, and I tend to valiantly try to tether other people around me in place as well. I'm resistant (though not completely) to being swayed. Thus, a tiny little anchor is an entirely appropriate tattoo for me.

Even so, I have not resolved to get a tattoo, but it is nice to know exactly what I would get. A new toy I DO have is a Mobiblu Cube MP3 player. I call it my Mobi. I LOVE it. I've wanted one for a long time now, and finally caved into my desire. It holds 1G and is so tiny and cute! I listen to it as I walk around campus to my classes and it feels like I have a soundtrack to my life. I think that was in some commercial for an mp3 player....anyway, it is like that, sometimes, and I'm really enjoying the experience.

Pictures galore!

2006-05-08T17:34:00.000-04:00

I have made some new albums on the site I use to host my pictures, so you can can click on the title of this entry to go to that site and see them. I have albums posted for Halloween 2005 (very late, I know, but I've been busy), my wedding, and my honeymoon. Since the honeymoon is most recent, and there are now some pics up for it, I will say a little about how that went.

Michael and I honeymooned at T.H. Stone Memorial St. Joseph Peninsula State Park. We reserved a campsite, and camped there for four nights. It was a beautiful park, and we had a great time. The beach was a short walk away, and there were several trails on which we hiked with our dog, Goose.

We went to the beach every day, at least twice. During the hottest part of the day, we would get in the car with Goose in the air conditioning and drive around to some of the local shops to pick up ice for our cooler and to get any other items we needed. Goose wasn't allowed on the beach, so it was good that he was able to stay cool during those hot and shadeless hours of the day. Michael and I spent a lot of time exploring the park, reading books, and playing games. Our campsite was electric, so we took my laptop and watched DVDs at night. It was very relaxing, and a complete pleasure-trip. It was nice to have a trip where we weren't obligated to do anything or visit family members (not that those aren't nice, but....this was nicer).

We have never been so close to so many different types of wildlife. Michael was swimming and dolphins swam within yards of him (I, of course, never got in water past my ankles, because I have an irrational fear of being attacked by sharks). There were crabs of differing sizes everywhere along the beach. We saw deer at least three different times. Once, we were on a trail with Goose and spotted one, and it didn't even run away. It just stood there, not fifty feet from us and we watched as it calmly walked away, about three minutes after we stared at each other. Another time, Michael and I were walking along the beach, and five or so deer came down from the dunes and walked near the water. Beach Deer! Crazy. I guess they like looking out at the water too. We also saw a grass snake, and some very cute and fat rats. The most comical event involved a raccoon. Michael was getting something out of a cooler we used as a pantry one night, and he walked to my car and opened the trunk to get something else out, and when he looked back, a raccoon was inside the cooler, and it grabbed our bag of marshmallows and took off. Michael threw my car keys at it to get it to drop the bag, and he retrieved the marshmallows. It was pretty funny: a raccoon with a sweet tooth.

Well, I've droned on long enough, but as you can see, the trip was great, and we had a wonderful time.

I survived!

2006-05-05T22:24:00.000-04:00

Okay, so...I survived the horrendous ethics exam I spoke of in the last post. I am not sure how, or how well I survived, but I did. I was pleased with all my grades this last semester.

I also survived my week of camping, on the belated honeymoon that Michael and I took. I will talk more about it when I make a post with a link to a photo album with the pictures I took while we were there. I didn't take very many because we were so busy actually enjoying the vacation that we would often forget the camera, and...well, I really can't regret that. I know some people love to catalogue every memory, and a lot of times they have these massive and wonderful albums, but I find I am happy enough just doing these things, and talking to others involved in those same events to jog my memory. I imagine I will feel differently when I'm older, as it seems that has been the case with many things, the older I get.

Speaking of being older, I figured out today that I am most fit for retirement. Michael and I were driving along the Florida coast, away from our campground on St. Joseph's peninsula, and I began to talk about the pros and cons of living on a beach. I have a picture in my mind of various scenes of myself living out my last years, and I feel an overwhelming peace. Though so many think that's one of the worst times in their lives, I think it will be one of the most peaceful and happy. In my retirement musings, I can easily imagine myself in a small cottage somewhere in Derbyshire, England (where most Jane Austen movie adaptations are set), with a small patio shaded by trees looking out over the rolling green hills peppered with jutting rocks. I will have a lovely garden, because that will be one of my main hobbies, and I will grow flowers and herbs. My little cottage will have two bedrooms (one for Michael and me, and one for guests) and a study with built-in bookshelves on three of the four walls, with the wall facing the most scenic view lined with large windows, and a long desk underneath them. I will spend my time reading lots of great literature and philosophy, gardening, and hand-writing letters, because hardly anyone writes letters anymore. I'll go on long walks in my straw hats or headscarves, and everyone will know me as the funny little American lady.

It's only fitting I'm dreaming of retirement, and that I think it will be a nice time in my life, considering I've always had a rather old personality. I'm not really vivacious, and I've never really had a wild streak. Michael used to worry that I would suddenly go wild one day and do all sorts of crazy things that I never did in college, but he's recently confessed that he no longer thinks that will happen. Occasionally, I loosen up a little, but for the most part, I'm responsible and ....well, most would classify me as rather boring. I've just never fit into whatever age I've been, and so..I think the age I'm really fit for just hasn't come up yet. Maybe twenty-four will be it? I'll know in June. Anyway, I'll post more interesting things next time, with links to albums with pictures of both (hopefully) the wedding and the honeymoon. Until then........

Twin Peaks Makeover and Test

2006-04-24T07:21:00.000-04:00

I've been watching Twin Peaks lately. I'm mesmerized by the show, but have no idea why. It is distinctly soapy in nature, but it's just so WEIRD I can't help myself. I'm especially taken with the character of Audrey Horne, played by Sherilyn Fenn. I want to grow my hair out into her style. What do you think?

So, when I say I've been watching the show lately, I mean that I watched it the week before this last week. This last week was hellish, because I had an important paper due on Monday, a HUGE HORRIBLE DIFFICULT test on Thursday, and I had grading that had to be done by Friday morning. I've never been so stressed in all my life, and it was justified, because the test I took was horrendous. It was just about what I expected, which was why I was terrified the entire week. I've never studied so hard for a test in my life. For all the good it probably did. Anyway, it's over, and there's nothing I can do about it now. Hopefully it will turn out okay.

BIG Update

2006-03-30T19:59:00.000-05:00

Well, needless to say, SO MUCH has happened. Michael and I were married over our spring break, and the ceremony was absolutely beautiful and wonderful. Everything else, though also beautiful and pretty much problem-free, was pretty stressful. When I stop recovering from the whole experience, I'll post an album of some of the best pictures online. Michael and I got back the Sunday after the wedding and were back in school Monday. It was exhausting, but we're extremely happy.

As if being exhausted from our "vacation" wasn't enough, Michael and I got really sick this last week with some 24 hour stomach bug thing. We have recently found that it was a case of food poisoning. Now we are perfectly fine, and the week is nearly over.

For some cheerier news, I got a new glasses! They're really cute, and I like them a lot. Michael said they make me look, "younger and nicer" and when he says 'nicer' he means "more approachable." The glasses look a lot like the ones I had when Michael and I first met, and my hair is short again, so...I guess it only makes sense that I would look younger and nicer.

Lastly, Michael and I are going to go camping for our honeymoon. One of my former professors gave us a tent and campstove that we registered for as a wedding gift. We are really excited, and have purchased some camping supplies. We are camping at T.H. Stone Memorial St. Joseph Peninsula State Park at Port St. Joe, Florida. It's supposed to be pretty awesome! Anyway, that's enough stuff for now.

Shouting obscenities

2006-02-24T18:20:00.000-05:00

So, today I have an almost overwhelming desire to shout obscenities. Not at anyone, just...to do it. I don't know why.

I can't believe I'm leaving for Texas for my wedding and stuff NEXT Saturday. GEEZ. Talk about something happening FAST. Good GOD.

Veil wail

2006-02-18T22:07:00.000-05:00

So, I tried to make my own wedding veil, because they're so expensive. I have made a total of three. It's a lot harder to make a veil than you would think. I finished the one that I thought would be THE one today, and it sucks. I have spent so much time on it, and yet it still ended up badly. It's very frustrating, and I think I'll end up going without a veil after all this wasted time. I'm just so sick at how much time I spent on making it, and yet it ends up looking like.....well, it just looks bad. UGH.

Not talking about the wedding....at all.

2006-02-08T17:51:00.000-05:00

Okay. So, I'm so stressed out. And I really don't know why, because at other times, when I have been in relevantly similar situations, I was WAYYYY behind and yet I didn't feel HALF as stressed. I think I'm addicted to procrastination. This semester, I've really been doing all the readings, and I've been analyzing and highlighting and underlining, and taking my time with my papers. I've been pretty careful. I start my reading and papers days before they are due. I'm being the 'good student' that I'm supposed to have already been. I've even been pretty good about keeping to my exercise schedule (but that's just because I'm worried about my wedding pictures). But with all this....doing everything I'm supposed to do, I feel even more stress. I keep thinking even as I type this that I should be working on one of the million things I have to do. I feel guilt if a day goes by where I didn't get at least one assignment done. I think the problem is that even though I've been pretty well on top of all of my work, I still feel behind. I still have tons to do, and I thought that if I worked really hard, the work would somehow dwindle, and I would feel more rested. It's a LIE. I feel even more stressed out, because now I expect EVEN MORE WORK FROM MYSELF! It's a VICIOUS CYCLE.

On to another subject. I've been listening to rap on my drive home lately. I got tired of my normal radio stations, because they play the same songs over and over, and worse, a lot of the songs they play I just don't like. And I don't feel like listening to the news. So, I decided to change it up, and it's....kinda funny, actually. For some reason, it's refreshing to hear about people wanting to bust caps in each other's asses and not sugarcoating or using cute little euphemisms for sexual behavior. I think I'm going crazy. I must be. Sigh.

Progress Report

2006-01-22T09:31:00.000-05:00

I have been busy. Between school and all the wedding stuff, time just speeds by. On the wedding front, I have been making tons of calls and securing more stuff. I'll be glad when the wedding is over, because it really is a lot of work. Even so, it really will be beautiful. I get a little overwhelmed just thinking about it, because I don't like big events in my honor. Also, there's just something strange about even thinking "I'll be married." It doesn't seem like much is going to change. Michael and I have been living together for about two years now, and we've settled into our little routines, and division of household labor, etc.. The only things that I can think of that will be different are my name, and our finances. Maybe those changes are bigger than I realize. Maybe there are further changes I don't even know about. Either way, it's going to happen, and happen soon. Very soon. March 11th soon. Well I'm going to shut up about the wedding, because I worry that it is all I talk about anymore, and has to be freaking BORING to hear about.

Okay... on to school. I am doing pretty well, keeping up with my readings, etc., but I worry that I'll fall behind. After all, I always do really well at the very beginning, but begin to slack off a few weeks into the semester. That just can't happen anymore. I have to do things like form committees of people for my master's exam at the end of summer, and all this other stuff. I have to pass a French translating exam at the end of the semester after going to only half of the available classes for that course. Even with all the stress involved, I can still say there's really nothing I'd rather be doing at this point in my life, and that's what keeps me going.

So, finally....do I have a physique like the actress I posted about the last time? Of course not. I just started my new round of exercise, SILLY. I'd like to think I'm getting better, but that's probably just wishful thinking. I've been exercising, but not as regularly as I'd like. I think I'll be spurred on even more once I start getting fitted for my gown, which begins this Tuesday. Once I see how I look at present in my gown, and think about pictures of myself looking like that, then maybe I'll be less lazy. Who knows. Anyway, this is long enough, and I'm tired of typing. Till next time.

LOOONG Post

2006-01-16T11:46:00.000-05:00

Like the pics?? They're pictures of what is going to be the NEW ME! Or rather, the body is going to be the new me, I hope (minus the really long legs...I just can't accomplish THAT). In like...two months. As part of my New Year's Resolution, and the desperate wish to look awesome for my wedding photos, I am going to eat a little less (not anything different though), and work out regularly. I did so well over the summer with the whole working out thing, but I really fell off the wagon during the fall semester. By the way, in case anyone is wondering, the actress in both pictures is Erica Durance, who plays Lois Lane on Smallville. She ROCKS. I would classify her figure as attainable, because she doesn't have six pack abs, and her arms are toned, but not sculpted. She's in shape, but not so built up or anything that it's ridiculous. If you saw her on the show, you'd understand what I mean. As you can see, the show thinks her body is a draw, because they keep creating situations for her to be unclothed. Pretty funny. Anyway, here's hoping I'll actually stick to my resolution.

I had a very nice and long break from school, and spent a lot of time with family and friends in Texas. I received some very nice gifts, and I hope those who received gifts from Michael and me enjoyed them. Much of the break in Texas was spent scurrying around taking care of wedding stuff. That involved lots of little meetings and phone calls. However, everything went off more or less without a hitch, which is somewhat surprising. I expect something to go wrong any time now. Because I know something has to go wrong with the whole wedding planning process....statistically speaking. The invitations are addressed and stamped, and now I just have to send my mom some maps to print out as inserts. I also need to contact hotels in Huntsville to see if they will give discounts if we reserve a block of rooms. I took one of my attendants bridesmaid shopping, and that was quite an experience. If you haven't looked at Pseudopunk's page, then you should, so you'll understand what I was dealing with. She's a wild and crazy girl, and was freaking HILARIOUS while trying on the many dresses we picked out (try to imagine her twirling around like a drunken ballerina with the clerk looking at her askance, or leaning over, gathering her skirt up to her knees and fanning it wildly, saying, "Yeah, we should take these hems up...we do NOT want swamp crotch."). Unfortunately, Crystal was not able to make it to that shopping expedition. We really did have a good time, and Michael came along so he could see Jennifer (Pseudopunk). I think I have prattled on enough for today, so I'm going to shut up.

The semester is over...and I'm sick.

2005-12-15T22:52:00.000-05:00

I'm SICK. Today was the last day that I had anything left to turn in or do for the semester, and now I'm sick. I woke up with a sore throat, and now the whole head cold thing is starting to happen. It feels more like sinus problems than a normal cold. It just sucks. I've been drinking lots of my beloved orange juice, in addition to various warm beverages to try and relieve my sore throat and stave off this potentially monstrous respiratory illness. I have to be better by the time we leave for Texas, because my mom and grandma both smoke and that will just cause further problems. Well, I think I'm going to go to bed to try and get some rest. More news will be reported when more news occurs.

The end is NEAR....

2005-12-14T23:38:00.000-05:00

The end of the semester is near. I'm so....so very relieved. This has been a very stressful week. At this point in time, I only have to proofread my very terrible paper for my Rawls course, and grade five papers. Then I'll be finished for the semester. I worked pretty hard this semester, and I think I will be rewarded with better grades, which is what I was going for. Everyone keeps saying grades don't matter, but those people are the ones making the really good grades. I think they matter in that they give you more confidence and thus make you more likely to participate more in class discussion. I also think they have an effect on faculty perceptions of your abilities. Thus, better grades makes me feel a lot better. Anyway, this is a very boring post, so I'm going to shut up. OH, something kinda depressing before I shut up: I took a quiz that both Michael and my friend Crystal also took, that asked, "What Age do you Act?" Michael and Crystal were both told they acted their exact and respective ages. I was told I acted 29 years old. TWENTY-NINE. That's six years older than I am, or I guess, closer to five and a half. Ye gads. Anyway, I don't know why it depresses me that it told me what I already know: I'm pretty much a stick in the mud, the librarian-like moralizing creature amongst my peers. Oh well.

Okie Dokie

2005-12-03T08:47:00.000-05:00

Well, after a long time of no posting, I should have a lot of news, right? Well, maybe not. My life can be dreadfully dull. Michael's parents are staying with us right now, and will be until around the 19th of December. Michael and I will be going to Texas for Christmas, which will be very nice. It may also be a bit hectic, since I have to accomplish a lot of wedding planning/securing of things while I am there. I have thus far purchased two gifts, and two gifts only. I need to finish my Christmas shopping very soon.

Ummm....school is going well enough, and is almost over (one more week before finals begin). I need to get cracking on a paper I have due next Wednesday (the plan is to write three pages a day from now until Tuesday). I may have to go to school over this weekend in order to concentrate on it, because there are a lot of distractions here at the house.

I watched the new Pride and Prejudice movie over the Thanksgiving break...twice. Yeah, I'm a sucker for such things. I am half in love with Mr. Darcy as portrayed by Matthew Macfadyen. A lot of people complain that he makes Mr. Darcy seem shy, rather than proud, but I really don't think that is the case. There were too many scenes where he really seemed very condescending. What IS the case is that his delivery of certain lines was AWESOME. I was able to see why Lizzie would fall in love with someone that first appeared so very rude. Don't get me wrong: Colin Firth was an almost perfect Mr. Darcy, but he had a lot more time to convince us that Lizzie could fall in love with someone that seemed so haughty before (it was a...I think 6 hour long miniseries, right??). Matthew Macfadyen only had 2 hours, so some of Mr. Darcy's traits had to be softened a bit, or we wouldn't have been convinced. Overall, the new Pride and Prejudice was a beautiful movie. Anyway, on to do the day-to-day things, like drink coffee, etc.

Dreams

2005-10-19T12:03:00.000-04:00

While I don't have recurring dreams, I do have a recurring type of dream. Of the dreams I can actually remember, most involve me trying to achieve some sort of goal or complete a task, and my every attempt is somehow thwarted. Thus, my dreams are like problem-solving nightmares, which means they are rather frustrating. Last night (or early this morning) I had a dream that I was sitting at a table outdoors with some friends (I can't remember who they were, or where we were), and I suddenly felt someone touching my hair. I look back, and a woman, who appears to be a hairdresser, is cutting my hair. I thought to myself, "Oh, that's right, I wanted to get a haircut." However, after taking maybe two snips of hair, the woman leaves, and I get up to follow her so I can get my haircut finished. Unfortunately, we are in this huge crowd of people, and I lose her. So I think, "Well, I'll just go get one at a salon or something." I go in search of a salon that somehow I know is nearby, and upon reaching it, I find that it is closed, because it is Sunday. I woke up with the feeling of frustration, because in my dream I thought, "No salons are open on Sunday!" I have no idea why I thought that, or even why I didn't think it was strange that a woman just came up behind me and started cutting my hair. Many of my dreams are this way. It's really weird.

Stuff

2005-10-05T19:05:00.000-04:00

Well, it has been a while since my last post, so I thought I would take a break from the dizzying whirlwind that is school, and post something. I've been BUSY. Lots of reading and writing and a little bit of grading. I'm trying to be a better student this semester, and thus far it has worked. I have been a lot better with keeping up with the readings, but I don't know how I'm doing grade-wise because I have only recently had to turn anything in. I do know that I am contributing more in class, so that's a marked improvement from last year. Michael and I have begun our pre-marital counseling (as required by Episcopal church, or at least by my uncle, the priest), and that is going well enough. I have so much to do concerning the wedding, but I keep putting it on the back-burner, at least until around December. Anyway, since I really don't have much to report, and I feel guilty because I'm not doing something school related, I am going to shut up now.

Now I just SOUND sick

2005-09-08T07:37:00.000-04:00

Well, I'm really not still sick, but I still sound sick. My voice has gone through several phases: there was the Demi Moore phase, which turned into a Kathleen Turner phase, and for several days now it has been the Stevie Nicks phase. I've been singing Fleetwood Mack songs whenever I'm by myself, because my singing voice is so AWESOME right now. But seriously, I'm starting to wonder if this is permanent, because I feel pretty good, yet my voice isn't better. I like Stevie Nicks and all, but I miss my own voice.

I have been too depressed to post much lately. The Hurricane Katrina disaster just...horrified me. I can't say much more than that, because I just get too angry and sad.

Michael and I are addicted to Lost. It's really sad. We, too, have fallen victim to the "What the hell's in the hatch?!" fever. We watch entirely too much TV. Especially for graduate students. By the way, Michael deserves some major congratulations, because he passed his prelim! He really worked hard, and was rewarded for it. I don't take my prelim until next semester, and I'm pretty much terrified. Well, I had better stop posting and do some reading, so that I can continue to fool these people into thinking that I actually belong in grad school.

Sick.

2005-08-31T07:36:00.000-04:00

I've been sick for the past couple of days. It is Michael's fault. He had a scratchy throat and general sluggishness on Saturday, and I came down with those symptoms on Sunday. On Monday, mine got a lot worse, and I took some medication and slept a lot. On Tuesday, I experienced the runny nose part of the illness. This morning, I woke up with Demi Moore's voice. Not fun.

End of summer progress report

2005-08-26T16:02:00.000-04:00

The end of summer vacation is finally upon me, and after considering the summer, I decided to report on the status of various projects and things that I may or may not have discussed on here.

First, readers may or may not recall that I was going to teach myself Latin. That didn't happen. Big surprise there, I'm sure. I'm hoping that being back on a schedule will prompt me to actually study it this semester, at least a chapter a week.

Second, I had hoped to do some research on the problem of evil. I started out very well at the beginning of summer, as I diligently printed out some papers I found online, and I read maybe.....some of one on the way to Texas. Upon my return from Texas, I didn't look at the papers even once, except to move them to a folder when I was trying to organize the quagmire that is the computer room. This progress report is looking pretty bad.

Third, I wanted to read a book on Leibniz over the summer. After about the fourth chapter, I gave up due to lack of interest and a conviction that I was crazy for starting such a project on my own in the first place.

Fourth, I wanted to reorganize the computer room/office. I actually did that, and it is working out fairly well. I rarely lose anything, and the biggest problem we were having (filing away important papers and shredding personal papers or junk mail that could be used for identity theft) is something we are doing a better job of keeping up with.

Fifth, I wanted to develop a consistent exercise regimen and get a little more fit. I was actually fairly successful with that, which is crazy, because I thought it was my most ambitious goal. Usually I work out a week and then give up, discouraged because my workout is difficult to complete or I get too sore. Actually, it is only in the past two weeks that I have started losing any weight. Before that, I was only changing my body composition: losing fat but gaining muscle. Thus, no real change in weight. I have gone down a size in undergarments, and I don't get as winded going up and down stairs or walking across campus. I still sweat like mad, but I think that is more due to the heat and humidity. I guess I did pretty well on this one. Well, I can't remember any other project I wanted to do.....and this is a long post, so I'm going to shut up for now.

Wedding Invitations...AAAHHHH!!!!!!!!

2005-08-25T11:03:00.000-04:00

Lately, my future mother-in-law, Karen, and I have been trying to do some major planning for the wedding. One of the things that will be a bit tricky concerns the invitations. Michael's parents are hosting a reception for us a few months after the wedding in Michigan, for their family and friends who were not able to attend the actual wedding. We are puzzling over how to handle the reception response cards and the wording of the invitations, etc. I've been playing with the settings on invitation sites, and it is surprising how tricky it can be. For instance, one would think that if you just picked the most inexpensive and simple invitation, you will automatically get the best deal. That isn't always the case, depending upon what other things you'll need with the invitation. In my case, I will probably need a response card and a reception enclosure card along with the invitation, and that is where a lot of the companies seem to trick you. I saw an invitation that I really liked, but thought it was a bit expensive. It turns out that the invitation itself may be more than other invitations, but the response cards and enclosures cost less than many other invitation enclosures, bringing down the price considerably. So I'll have to be very careful to make sure I'm getting what I want for the best price. SIGH.

The school is stirring....

2005-08-23T11:50:00.000-04:00

I went to the office today because I needed to be advised, and I was happy to see lots of people running around the department. Some of the faces were unfamiliar, but it is still nice to know that very soon I will be getting back into action. I also spent some time organizing my office, like getting rid of old papers and notes and filing away important stuff. I'll get to see everyone on Friday at the department meeting. This semester I will be a TA for Reasoning and Critical Thinking. I'm happy about it because it is a course I haven't assisted for yet, so it will be good course experience. On the other hand, I will have discussion groups again, which can be both good and bad. Discussion groups are good for the students, and good for me, because it gives me some teaching experience and more one-to-one interaction with the students. It's bad because it takes a bit more preparation, and this semester I have set some goals for myself concerning my coursework and language studies. I really want to be more disciplined this semester, and hope to cultivate some good work habits. We'll see how well all that works out.

Movie: The Island

2005-08-13T10:21:00.000-04:00

Michael and I went out with some friends to see The Island last night. It was pretty good, despite the science being a bit bogus. However, as was pointed out to me in an argument about such matters, science FICTION doesn't have to be scientifically accurate or even believable. A lot of people have complained about how the movie put in lots of crashes, bangs, explosions, and the like. I actually liked it. A few of the incidents even made me wince. I could have lived without the sex scene in the movie, but hey, it had explosions and crashes, so I guess it needed one of those too. All in all, it was an enjoyable experience.

Slightly bored

2005-08-09T09:44:00.000-04:00

I want to go back to school, NOW. I'm ready. All I have to do is buy books, and I'll be set. I'm getting a bit bored around here, and starved to see familiar faces. I miss my fellow graduate students, including the annoying ones. I am also anxious to find out what my TA assignment will be for the fall semester. For my first two semesters, I assisted the same instructor, and it was awesome. He and I got along, and by the second semester I already knew his teaching style and how he liked to grade, so it was pretty easy. This time, I will definitely be assisting someone else, and I am not sure what to expect. Anyway, I'll stop whining.

To dye or not to dye......

2005-07-31T11:56:00.000-04:00

I'm thinking of coloring my hair. Nothing fancy, just a slightly darker/different shade than what I already have. This sudden urge is very much connected to the appearance of a coupon in the Sunday paper for the haircolor brand I would want to use. The brand is Clairol Natural Instincts, which I like because it isn't harsh and only stays around for about a month. So if I don't like the color, it can be washed out pretty easily. But I don't know. I'm a bit of a chicken when it comes to stuff like that. I think I fear change in my appearance, EVEN if it is for the better. If I change something about my appearance, then even if it turns out well, it isn't familiar, and familiarity equals security. I feel most secure when I appear how I usually appear, even though that may mean being rather lackluster. Maybe I'm just weird.

Where it's at.....

2005-07-26T17:11:00.000-04:00

Well folks, this is where it's at. What do I mean? I mean only this: I have deleted my other blogs. This occurred when I realized that I wanted to post something on my blog, but that it would fit better on one of my topic blogs. I had the distinct feeling that no one was visiting those topic blogs, and so I decided to just put EVERYTHING here. I have almost all the links from my topic blogs on the sidebar now, and now all my posts will be from here. Nifty, huh? I'm pretty happy about it. It makes everything pretty simple. I don't know why I ever did things differently.

Anyway, so what did I want to post? Well, as a matter of fact, for those of us who are Buffy the Vampire Slayer fans, Buffy alums are popping up everywhere in shows this fall. Here goes:
Nicholas Brendon will be in a show airing on Fox called "Kitchen Confidential" and it will air on Monday, September 19th, 8:30 P.M. What makes the show really interesting (for me, at least) is that it also has John Francis Daley from the wonderful but short-lived "Freaks and Geeks".

Alyson Hannigan will be in a show airing on CBS called "How I Met Your Mother" on Mondays at 8:30 P.M. Even stranger is that this show ALSO has a former "Freaks and Geeks" cast member, Jason Segel.

David Boreanaz will be in "Bones" which is also on Fox, and premieres Tuesday, September 13th at 8:00 P.M..

Seth Green is supposed to be on a show airing on NBC this fall called "Four Kings" but it is difficult to find out anything directly from NBC about it.

James Marsters will be appearing as a villain on the the WB's "Smallville" this fall. You can read the press release concerning this here.

Exciting times. What's bad is that Alyson Hannigan's show and Nicholas Brendon's look to be airing at the same time. I'm hoping that they will start moving things around a bit after the premieres. Anyway, let's hope these are good shows!

It's been a while....

2005-07-18T09:40:00.000-04:00

Wow. It's pretty sad when your last blog entry is about your road being widened. What a gripping life I do lead. I am just completing my morning ritual of coffee and online comic reading. I was inspired to post by the fact that I found my friend Tina has been posting lately (I hadn't visited her page for a week or two). I have been obsessed with my Sims 2 game of late, playing for hours and hours almost every day. Their world is just so much more interesting right now. Plus I CONTROL THEM *evil laughter*. I'm very excited about the expansion pack that will be coming in early fall, called Sims 2 Nightlife. I tend to like the expansion packs mostly for the new objects and building materials. Don't get me wrong, some of the gameplay features are fun too. In the Sims 2 College expansion pack, Sims can now participate in a band experience. Though they can only play one song in the style of either rock, country, or jazz, it is still pretty awesome to watch them begin playing according to their personal skill levels. Anyway, I'm really showing my inner geek with this entry, so I'm going to shut up and go exercise.

Yay for a wider road!

2005-07-01T12:51:00.000-04:00

Whoo HOO! I can get to school so easily now it's just silly. My road is OPEN again. It's amazing. I had to go in to school today for my Greek reading group, and it was so easy. I didn't have to go through any bad traffic or anything! I'm always surprised at how excited I get over silly things like an easier, traffic-free path to and from school.
After finishing my Greek reading group, I always feel the need to do more in my Greek education. I can barely translate one sentence in an hour. However, I am getting a little better at it. If I really worked on it, I bet I could start actually contributing to the group. I found a few books on Amazon that concentrate on philosophical Greek, which is what I need. When I have an income again, I plan to pick some of these books up. Michael and I are making plans for the 4th of July, involving a trip to Tom Brown Park for the fireworks show. That reminds me...I need to call up a friend or two to invite them. Anyway, I'd better stop my rambling.

Exercise and road construction

2005-06-27T12:35:00.000-04:00

I fell off the wagon. My exercise wagon. I really didn't mean to, it just sort of happened. First, the week in Texas threw me way off...and then when we got back, all the stuff with the movers and everything gave me lots of excuses to put it off. I am happy to say that I have started again today, and that I think I'll get my exercise groove back. This is the first time since I've been back from Texas that I enjoyed my exercise routine again. Every other time I tried it was just annoying and boring. I think it helps that I made a new music playlist on Windows Media Player that has nothing but faster-paced tunes that I really like. I can pipe it in through the sound system, and it really keeps me going.
I haven't griped about it on here yet, but we've had some major road construction going on near our house since February. Due to the most recent detours from this road construction, we have had to take the long way to get to a lot of businesses and even to school for the last month. It sucks. Even with the main detour began in February, it was still kinda sucky, because we had to give our friends directions on how to navigate through these little neighborhoods to make it to our house. The road is looking close to done now, as they have started painting the lines on, and I know that part of the detour will be lifted at the end of June in a few days. I am hoping that they will be done with the entire thing at the end of June, because that would be AWESOME. A straight shot to everything would be so nice.

The house is CONQUERED

2005-06-22T08:53:00.000-04:00

Movers. UGH. Don't talk to me about movers. I'm sure not all movers are as bad as the ones we had to deal with, but STILL. Anyway, the house is almost finished. I have reorganized closets and cabinets and somehow found a place for most of the stuff. The house is really shaping up now. This victory did come with some costs: I have lots of scratches and bruises, my foot is hurt, my arms are covered in mosquito bites, and for the past three mornings, I have awoken feeling like a truck both hit and rolled over on me. Hopefully my life will get back to normal.

Movers. UGH.

2005-06-17T08:49:00.000-04:00

So, remember those movers that were supposed to bring furniture to my house? They never came. They finally called last night and said they were coming today. Hmph. Oh well, at least they haven't absconded with all the stuff and called us to ransom it back. I am once again pulling around the existing furniture and stuff to make room for the new stuff.

On a brighter note, I have taken up knitting! Michael took me to Michaels (ha!) the other day while we were running errands around town, because he's sweet and realized I was suffering from a little cabin-fever (it's my own fault, I'm just too lazy to go anywhere). We wandered into the yarn section and I thought it would be fun to learn to knit. I decided to see if I could learn for free by a) looking online to see what sorts of internet sources there were for knitting instruction, and b) going to the public library and picking up books on knitting. So, I have a pair of knitting needles and a ball of yarn, and I've been practicing away. It really can be relaxing, but since I'm a novice and move the needles awkwardly right now, my hands cramp up after a little while. We'll see how this progresses.

New blog and stuff

2005-06-14T09:14:00.000-04:00

My wedding blog is up and running, and you can find a link to it under my topic blog sidebar. It's not much right now, but I hope to do things with it like post lots of information concerning my wedding for interested parties. On a funny note, my mom's favorite pasttime is, apparently, getting tattoos with her friends. Not long after I left Texas, my mom began to seek out things to do on the weekends. She and a few of her friends would go out and get either a tattoo, piercing, or both. Since this tattoo parlor apparently has a lot of business, these outings last into the wee hours of the morning, so after being tattooed, pierced, or both, my mom and her friends go to IHOP for coffee and to revel in their new body art. My mom has three tattoos (to date), and last weekend she added to one of them. She has a wonderful time during this strange tattooing ritual, and I am glad that she has so much fun. I can only hope that one day I'll be as cool and laid-back as my mom (but I seriously doubt it will happen).

Pictures!

2005-06-09T12:04:00.000-04:00

If you click on the link that is the title to this blog entry, then you can see pictures I have arranged into some albums on a picture hosting site called My Photo Album or something like it. If you like what you see, it's free and easy to use. For those of you interested, the pictures from Crystal's bachelorette party are posted on that site, and I'm going to try and organize all my photos into albums on that site this summer.

Birthday

2005-06-07T10:54:00.000-04:00

Today is my birthday. I am twenty-three. As usual, I don't feel any older or any different. I had cake and a few presents with my family and friends on Sunday, June 5, the day before we left Texas. I think I'll get another cake today, because I really REALLY like cake. There's lots to do here in Tallahassee now that we're back. I need to retrieve my fish from a friend's house, as well as organize the furniture and stuff that will be arriving any minute. Goose (my dog) is scheduled to have a teeth cleaning and checkup at the vet's tomorrow, and I'd really like to get my wedding blog page up and running soon, as the planning will really begin now that I have a wedding/reception site reserved. I also need to post pictures of Crystal's bachelorette party and the few I took of the rehearsal dinner and wedding. So much to do and so little inclination to start. Michael and I also need to go grocery shopping, and THAT is something I really want to do. Food is always fun. OH geez...I almost forgot. I need to do a lot of stuff to establish Florida residency. Ugh. Well, enough of this riveting information. I'm off to do some of these things.

Home again!

2005-06-06T20:05:00.000-04:00

I am back home! I'm pretty happy to be back, and to find the house is still here and everything is basically the same. It will be a busy week though, because movers will be here tomorrow to unload lots of furniture and boxes into our house. Michael's parents are selling the lakehouse in Texas, and have sent much of the stuff our way. I have to make some room somehow for all of this stuff. Oh well. The drive back was okay, but it rained for most of the trip so that was terrible. As soon as we drove into Tallahassee, the skies opened up for a torrential downpour that hasn't stopped yet. We haven't unloaded the car, and the electricity was out for a little while. I am still glad to be back. The wedding was beautiful, and I'll elaborate more on it when I have a bit more time. For now I'm off to put some pizza in the oven and watch some DVDs.

Texas stuff

2005-05-29T14:34:00.000-04:00

Well, Michael and I are in Texas. Michael will be attending a conference later in the week, and we both will be in a wedding next Saturday. Right now we are in Galveston visiting my dad, taking in the sunny beaches. Crystal (the bride-to-be) and another one of the bridesmaids, Ashley, came to Galveston last night, and we had a bachelorette party of sorts, with lots of bar-hopping good fun. Happily, I did NOT get sick. What is pretty freaking awesome is that we went to a bar called Poor Michael's (HA! Michael was our designated driver, so that was very fitting), and they had Guinness on tap. I had one, and liked it well enough. I will post a pic or two later of all of us. Tomorrow we set off for Corrigan to see more family. I'll post more when more happens!

Nifty internet things

2005-05-25T10:17:00.000-04:00

There are lots of things that are nifty to do on the internet. Just when I think I'm tired of it, and there's nothing more I can do or nothing more I can think of to surf, Tina manages to send me a new thing to do. The latest thing is Rojo. I just signed up for it today, and it is a neat thing where you can keep up with news by selecting your interests and a group of sources. If you have any contacts in Rojo, you can share news stories easily. Another nifty internet thing (also suggested by Tina) is Stumbleupon. With a Stumbleupon toolbar on your browser, you can "stumble upon" other sites based upon your interests, reviewed by other users. You can also stumble sites to friends. It is a fun thing, though I don't use it as much as I should. So, if you're bored with the internet, try some of these things out!

Rum is still not my friend

2005-05-23T22:48:00.000-04:00

I once had a bad experience with rum. Really bad. Ever since that experience, I have not been able to enjoy drinks with rum in them. It is POSSIBLE for me to drink them, but it is not pleasurable in the least. After the third or fourth sip, I start to shudder. I am amazed at the strength of my learned aversion to rum. It only took one bad time to effectively ruin my experience of that particular beverage. Even though I know how the aversion works, I am still amazed. I thought perhaps it was only the particular mixed drink that I had when the bad experience occurred (rum and coke), but no, it's the rum. I wanted a pina colada tonight, and Michael was gracious enough to go out and get the stuff, and come back and make it. I had a few sips of it, and realized that I wouldn't be able to drink the stupid thing. My stomach was saying, "OH no. Not that stuff again. Not going to happen." Ugh. Which probably means that vodka is ruined for me as well. Double ugh.

Fish Babies

2005-05-23T12:11:00.000-04:00

Want some fish? We have tons now. Michael has an aquarium with several fish in it, and one of them just gave birth. We just thought it was a very chubby fish. The mother is a dalmatian molly, and apparently was impregnated before Michael bought her. She had TONS of babies. Lots. I looked up information on her breed, and how to care for the babies, etc., and found out that she may have even more babies. Apparently, they can have two or three batches of young out of one insemination. YIKES. I'm hoping she gave birth a few times before Michael got her. We bought a little tank to isolate the little fish in, and hopefully they will be okay. We also bought some weird liquid food to give them. The whole thing is interesting, but I wonder if many of the little ones will survive.

Rudeness

2005-05-18T14:01:00.000-04:00

Sometimes I can't believe how mean people are to each other. I was walking back to my car from Dodd Hall (home to my office at school) when I saw an exchange in a parking lot that left me a little angry. A guy was apparently waiting to pull out of a parking lot in his vehicle, and his window was down. A female driver was approaching the parking lot to pull in, and did not use her signal. The guy leaned out of his window and spat out, "Way to use your signal DUMMY" and it was loud enough for me to hear even though I was across the street and there were cars going by. I felt my nose wrinkle in distaste at this odious person, and my brows lowered into a threatening and irritated glare. He sped off, oblivious to having caused my ire, and I walked along, pondering the situation. It isn't that I am so serene myself that I never get angry when other drivers do that same thing, but I certainly don't lean out of my window and CALL them dummies. I may think that very thing to myself, but I don't verbalize it. I have even said such things to myself within the confines of my enclosed car, but I am never so vocal when I think others may hear me. I mean, when you think about it, it's such a little thing to berate someone about. I am not saying that the other driver was in the right, but it certainly didn't merit the epithet issued from the extremely impatient driver. If he just would have left off the "dummy" I think I would have been much less offended. Perhaps there should be a push to be more courteous? Maybe he should have said, "Please use your turn signal!" Maybe I'm just a wuss.

Raccoon.

2005-05-16T13:48:00.000-04:00

Last night (rather, very early this morning) was VERY strange. Around two-ish, my sleep was disturbed by the sound of Michael walking around the bedroom saying, "Did you hear that? There! Do you hear that?!" I immediately thought we had some intruders in the house and wondered why he wasn't on a phone, but Michael went to the window and said, "THERE! There's something on the roof! Look!" and I groggily got up and peered blindly out the window, then remembered to get my glasses. Just as I was looking out of the window again, Michael turned on the light and pointed to the roof, saying, "Look! It's a raccoon!" and I finally saw it. Michael beat on the window shouting "GO AWAY," etc., and I wondered how he had heard it in the first place. After he scared it away, he said the sound of scratching on the roof woke him up, and he couldn't get back to sleep. I have NO IDEA how he heard this, when he seems to sleep through TONS of other things. Especially since the very loud dehumidifier was on when I was brought into the situation. Anyway, it wasn't a nice way to wake up. Stupid raccoon.

AHHH!

2005-05-13T11:56:00.000-04:00

I am an IDIOT. Obviously. I wrestled with a Greek translation for about half an hour yesterday, and for several hours today. What did I get for my foolish, misguided pains?? SEVEN SENTENCES OF DRIVEL. Why? It's certainly not Plato's fault, it is MINE. Two semesters of Greek, and yet I can barely translate any real texts. I know I learned things, but...this is so very difficult and frustrating. I MUST get better at this, or I will scream in AGONY from the time wasted on learning Greek. I need a punching bag.

The feeling of accomplishment

2005-05-11T14:33:00.000-04:00

Well, I went to school today to do some research (I hope to update my philosophy blog concerning this research), and I feel like I really did accomplish something. I looked up articles, then printed out as many as I could access. I also checked a book out of the little philosophy library to read. Hopefully I will actually read all this information, so that this isn't just a way to pass the time. I always feel really good on the days I go to school. I think I must be very reliant on habit. Or maybe I'm just weird. I'm beginning to develop a summer weekday routine, which seems to go like this:
1. Receive wake-up call from Michael at 8:00 A.M.
2. Actually get out of bed at 8:20 A.M. to make coffee, eat cereal for breakfast and read comics online
3. Do light housework (clean kitchen, pick up wayward clutter) around 9:30 A.M.
4. Work out on treadmill around 10 A.M.
5. Shower around 11 A.M.
6. Specific chores/errand-running, etc., or just plain laziness and sloth

I AM actually getting some things done. For instance, I have worked on my website, put up some shelves after staining them, and reorganized the kitchen and office. Plus, I'm surprising myself with the whole exercising thing. Usually I stop this nonsense after about 3 days, but I've been pretty consistent for about a week and a half. There are, however, things I should be doing that I'm not as consistent about, like my Latin (only doing a chapter a week instead of the planned two thus far), and Greek (haven't translated a word). Ugh.

Ugh. Swimsuit Season

2005-05-08T14:20:00.000-04:00

If hell exists, then for women it is surely a place where you have to shop for swimsuits for eternity. I tried shopping for a swimsuit today, and thus experienced a little bit of hell. Movies and magazines have taken their toll on me. I can't be pleased when it comes to me in a swimsuit. I never find a suit where I look in the mirror and say, "Wow, I look good!" Instead, I think, "I don't look horrendous," and then the longer it stays on, I begin to think, "Oh, wait. Yeah, I look horrendous." I don't know why I bother. As body-conscious as I am, it's not like I'll go swimming anyway. BLAH.

New Haircut

2005-05-06T14:57:00.000-04:00

I cut my hair short today. It's awesome! I updated my profile picture to show it, but I don't know how much you can really see from it. Even so, just click on the profile pic and you can see sorta how it is. Anyway, I love it, and it's great!

Summer Uselessness

2005-05-03T08:22:00.000-04:00

Well, it is the second day of my official break from school, and I feel USELESS. I hate this feeling! What is even more confusing, is that I was looking forward to this break so very much. Before the break, I thought, "Yay!! Months without a paper being due, without having a mountain of reading, and without grading student papers! I can't wait!" And now I feel weird. Like I should be in my office, feverishly translating Greek. I almost feel melancholy. I think that is the danger of becoming acclimated to so much activity: when it is gone, you feel useless and depressed. It isn't as if I'm just sitting around doing nothing either, as I make out these careful schedules of my time in an attempt to feel like I'm really accomplishing something. I clean, I exercise, and I complete little projects around the house that I never had time for before. I even schedule in time to do scholarly work, like learning Latin and translating some Greek. Before long, I plan to schedule in time to work on a paper topic I've been thinking about for a long time. Even so, with all this activity, I still do not feel right. I think I'll have to go to the office at least once a week. This SUCKS.

Not responsible for that last post

2005-05-01T17:28:00.000-04:00

I did not make that last post. It was made during an attempt to show people my blog at a party, and so...yeah. I would delete it, but it is sorta funny. And that's all I'm going to say about that.

Wow, I think I like OJ

2005-04-30T20:22:00.000-04:00

Sometimes I like to drink orange juice. It is yummy and juicy and wet. My throat gets dry, and then I have orange juice. Thank you.

--Rachel Roden

Starting over

2005-04-28T12:17:00.000-04:00

Well, I'm trying to start this blog over again, because I want to really begin utilizing the features of this blog page. I hope to eventually make this into my main homepage, so that my family and friends can keep up with me easily. Anyway, here's hoping I actually come through!

Which Greek God/Goddess am I?

2004-07-15T07:28:00.000-04:00

Athena

?? Which Of The Greek Gods Are You ??
brought to you by Quizilla

What country am I?

2004-07-13T08:41:00.000-04:00

You're France!

Most people think you're snobby, but it's really just that
you're better than everyone else. At least you're more loyal to the real
language, the fine arts, and the fine wines than anyone else. You aren't
worth beans in a fight, unless you're really short, but you're so good at other
things that it usually doesn't matter. Some of your finest works were
intended to be short-term projects.
Take the Country Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid

My first post!

2004-07-05T02:58:00.000-04:00

Well, I really don't know what to say....how about Happy Independence Day (although it will no longer be July 4th in about three minutes)! Anyway, I'm off to watch some Adult Swim!